Yesterday I wrote down my major moments from the past year.
TBH, there really weren’t many– lots of normal everyday (but still special) moments that make up life, but the big ones that leave a quick and deep impact were few.
I used to pride myself on the quantity of big moments and accomplishments.
I found value and worth in being able to do so much.
But 2018 I decided I had enough. I wanted slow, simple, less. I suppose there’s some poetic beauty in my short list.
- I went back to the Grandest of Canyons for a third time. I rowed more rapids– including Bedrock! I trusted Nick to get me safely through Lava Falls instead of walking around it. I looked fear in the eye many times, and said “No. You don’t own me.” I met wonderful people. I had the most fun yet. I look forward to her welcoming me back in the future.
- I ruthlessly curated my social media feeds. I removed hundreds of “friends”. I unfollowed pages and businesses that didn’t provide any value or make me feel good about myself. I stopped spending so much time on social media. I still enjoy scrolling through IG, which is where you’ll find me most often. But if you’re wondering why you don’t see me on FB much– I’m sort of over it.
- I only ran two races, but both were 50Ks. Both showed me that I am more than I think in different ways. The Catoctin 50K was physically HARD, but I was mostly positive and happy. I finished with 35 min to spare. I was in a lot of pain, but I was injury free! The Blues Cruise 50K was mentally HARD. I wanted to quit. I would have quit, but Nick wouldn’t let me, because “You’re not a quitter”. His faith in my strength and resilience was probably the only thing that got me to that finish line.
- I transitioned roles at work. This occupied much of my mental and emotional capacity for months. It forced me to really understand what is most important to me in a job. I’m probably a little dramatic– but it forced me to seek answers to a lot of deeper questions about my value and purpose; and how I engage with, empower, and show love, kindness, and respect to those around me.
- We bought another rental property. It was a complete flip and took, what felt like, forever to finish. But! It’s beautiful. The best one yet. I learned some new skilks– I installed the wood floor and I finally helped with a roof because I could climb out a window instead of up a ladder.
I could sum up my theme of 2018 as “growth through letting go”.
I still have so much work to do on myself and plan to carry this theme into the new year.
Happy New Year!
🤍 amanda maureen